The E Boyd's 3 Keys to Parenting

I've had a few conversations lately with several people dealing with parenting issues. Although we probably don't have the answers to their specific problems, we have some keys to success. These keys can only happen with love and respect in your home. However, it is also true that following these keys will enable love and respect to exist in your home.
Numero Uno: Parents must be parents first. We have come into contact with families that had parents who fall into the "parents must be friends first" category. This type of parent believes that it is more important to be considered "cool," brushing aside rules that should be enforced in order to preserve good standing in their child's eyes. There are too many "good cops" in the world and children are finding themselves lacking the structure and discipline to enable them to become successful children, and eventually successful adults wherever they may live, work, and associate. As a parent, you may be required to play the role of "bad cop" more often than the prior. Leave the good cop role to their friends, their teachers, their principal. If you do not discipline, who will? Your child will eventually appreciate the love you have for them by establishing those rules early on and things will begin to be easier.
Number Two: Consistency is key. Just as the laws of the land have established a predetermined consequence for the breaking of a law, you, as the parent, must establish what the consequences will be enforced for the undesired actions of your child. For example, if you run a red light, there is a fine associated with that offense. Therefore, when a child breaks a family law/rule, the child should be expected to "pay" for that offense. Granted, there are innumerable ways in which your child may choose to act out and test the boundaries. However, you can still establish that there are different levels of punishment to match the severity of the offense. We would also caution against justifying the alteration of these rules and disciplines for one child over the next. Be consistent with punishments (as well as rewards) with each child and between each of your children. We have witnessed the leniency of punishment for one child over another and what this demonstrates to the children. We aren't saying you must punish a 10 year old the same way you would punish a 2 year old. We are saying that if a 16 year old child skips school, when the next child reaches a similar age and commits the same breach of trust, the same punishment should be enacted.
Number Three: Follow through. It seems easy enough, but often parents get frustrated with a situation and throw something random into the mix to cause the shock and awe effect. Rely on your previous preparation for those confrontations. If need be, take time as a couple to discuss things before throwing on the threats. Threats are just that. They are not effective because you are not willing to follow through with them. Your child WILL call your bluff on the matter and essentially will win, destroying your authority. On the flip side, if you promise them something (as a reward) then you must follow through with that as well. Do not promise something you cannot fulfill. When you give your word, make sure you have the integrity you expect out of your child as well.
Children want your affection, approval and respect. These three keys have helped us to create an atmosphere of love and respect in our own home. We have witnessed for ourselves the way this helps our children to have a happy childhood because they know what is expected of them as well as what to expect from us.